My husband, Ainsley, who still lives in the UK as we go through the process of his immigrating to the US, has been diagnosed with cancer. We still don’t know the type of cancer it is but we know what we’re doing about it.
This didn’t happen by accident. This didn’t happen by chance. It’s happening for many reasons and mostly to provide an opportunity to deeply grow into more expansive love in all respects. Love for self, others, circumstances, experiences, etc. It is an infinitely powerful force that informs our existence and provides the reference point from which everything else flows.
And Love heals.
Here’s Ainsley’s perspective on things…I wish to share it in the spirit of great Love for you all.
“For all those wonderful people out there who have sent me prayers and loving well wishes, I want to say that I love you all. I had my latest results today, relating to the Testicular Cancer . I was told that the tumour they found is more likely to be some sort of Lymphoma, this means that the tumour has to be tested more specifically to decipher what exactly is occurring. I will have to wait for around 2 weeks before I know anything else. So this is what I have decided ( with my beautiful wife Krista ). I am not going to attach myself to any sort of prognosis because as yet there isn’t one. I’m healing very well from my Op and have continued to feel healthy and well within myself. I am on a journey with the deepest truest sense of love and it’s power. I am sharing this now because I want to be an example to others that, walking through our lives with love reveals the abundance of life. I am a powerful force in my own life and when I want something I always get it. My ultimate desire is to live and serve with Krista, this I will achieve. I made a statement a long while ago that stands more true today than ever. I told Krista that to be with her I would move mountains and that there is nothing that can stop me. I revised that today by adding that if I needed to I would take the mountain apart block by block. For my dear friends who read this, hold only joy for me because I remain joyful. Feel happiness with me because I am happy. I knew coming into this life ( and was reminded during my NDE ) that there would be certain experiences which would shape me, I feel deeply in my soul that they are on my path, not to test me, but to help me love more, inspire more, to share more and to continue serving those I am blessed to serve, just because I can“
Much Love to you xox
I don’t know about the rest of you but I do life better sometimes with instructions. When I was initially going through my healing process many years ago, I didn’t know how to live, like physically day-to-day live in this world. I knew I, we all are, love but didn’t know how to embody that love.
So, I meditated. I sat in silence and connected with myself. Then, I created the Twelve Principles. They are what I used/use as my daily guide for living. They are, when practiced, what help to recreate the being of love I was in the afterlife.
Living here is an art, a beautiful expression of the divine pure light energy we are. Practicing the Twelve Principles is how I create my own artful living. The Principles are:
Live In Awareness
When my focus is taken off the many distractions around me and placed on these simple principles, my life flows with such ease and with so much more love. I’ll be writing more about them…but they are in my book ‘I Died And Learned How To Live’. They are the embodiment of my NDE.
Much Love to You All! xox
A book about how NDE’s transformed lives and can help transform the world. My story is a part of this wonderful book as well as my twin soul Ainsley Threadgold’s. Our individual and collective journey’s are outlined in several chapters and all proceeds go to charities benefitting children around the globe. Please preorder/order your copy and share is this amazing journey with all of us! This book will transform lives! Love to you all xoxo
How often have you said to yourself: “I really need to do xyz” or “I really need to stop doing xyz.” Speaking for myself, thousands of times. The “shoulds” and “shouldn’ts” put pressure on us and imply that yucky feeling word…guilt.
Each and every time we think and/or say those words we add to the negative expression of ourselves. That need to do or don’t do, the very thought of those words causes negative feelings in the body. In that moment, there’s an immediate feeling of not being who or what we are supposed to be, whether we’ve set the expectation or someone else has.
The thing is, we are always everything we are supposed to be all the time, in every moment. There is never a second that goes by where we are anything but.
It’s about changing the energy around the “need” to do something to one of gentle intention, the feeling of having a choice about the matter rather than a pressure to accomplish whatever it is you’re wanting to accomplish. Sometimes we may not have a “choice”, it just has to be done. That’s fine, but take that energy you’d usually create as pressure to do it and soften it, love it and allow it to flow through you and into what it is you’re doing. That is acting out the vibration of love.
So, go wash those dishes, get ready for work, get that degree and take the time to change your thoughts and feelings around how you do those things. It’s your choice. Much Love xox
After a bit of a hiatus I’ve decided to put my book back up on Amazon while I’m in the process of a revision for those who are asking for it…it’s really a work in progress like us all but I didn’t want to hide it away from the world while it’s being nurtured 🙂
Love to You!!
I learned so many things from my near death experience but the one single thing overarching all the others was experiencing the infinite power of our intentions.
The “events” within my experience were created and co-created with the universal energy I returned to, which was and is love. It taught me how our state of being, our vibe, our disposition, our energy creates our reality. Our thoughts become things. They shape our life and ultimately our world.
Negative thoughts create negative things. Negative thinking perpetuated second by second, minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day, week by week, well you get the idea-creates a negative life. Other negative people show up, less than desirable outcomes happen, things seem to always go “wrong”. When these things happen in our lives we aren’t victims of circumstance, it’s simply that we lack the awareness of our innate ability to create our lives.
Intention is thought with a purpose. I intend to have a good day, so I direct my thoughts toward the positive. If I find myself in the middle of a negative thought, I turn it around, trying always to be aware of when I’m thinking them. To be aware I pay attention to how I feel as I’m thinking the thought. If it makes me feel good, I go with it. It’s “right” for me. If it makes me feel crappy, I change the thought about what I’m thinking about, or change the thing I’m thinking about. I alter my inner or outer world to create the best possible state of being for me.
I am infinitely powerful. So are you.
Wishing you so much love!
In September 2016 my daughter and I flew to Albuquerque New Mexico to meet Morgan Freeman. Yes, God himself (Bruce Almighty and Evan Almighty references lol). That came about only after I had walked through a lot of fear about sharing my NDE. When I finally did so at an IANDS (International Association of Near Death Studies) conference in 2014, my first ever, I brought a little book I wrote called I Died And Learned How To Live. I put it in the bookstore there and someone bought it. She wasn’t planning on buying anything but saw my book and was drawn to it.
This person brought my story home and shared it at her local IANDS chapter meeting… two years later...and another person was drawn to it. This person had been contacted by Morgan Freeman’s production company months before to help them find people who’d had an NDE to be on their show. They’d settled on someone but weren’t entirely comfortable with them, so this person went home after the IANDS meeting and emailed the contact person for the show, telling them to get in touch with me.
I received an email from them on a Thursday night (they found me through this blog) and was skyping with them the following Monday. Then, my daughter and I were invited to New Mexico to be interviewed by Mr. Freeman.
I was not nervous, nor overly excited. I was grateful to be able to share the message of love. That love has been taught to me by all those who have entered and stayed or entered and left my life. I have felt the deepest love of the universe encompass all that I am, a love without bounds or end. That love has been shown to me in my life. I’ve also experienced its opposite, which helps me to recognize it even more, to desire to have it even more, to be it even more.
We are love. Every thing being and non-being is love energy. At the same time, we are the opposite of love. At any given moment we have the free will to choose love over its opposite–fear, over ego. That’s the beauty of this life, we have the choice. We can choose to experience joy or we can choose to suffer, either way we choose.
For me, right now in this moment, I choose love and I absolutely love you all xox
This is a topic that came up in conversation today around my NDE and coming back…how did I continue living in this 3D world knowing what I knew?
It wasn’t easy. I spent so much time going around and around in my head about what I knew happened and what my ego wanted to tell me didn’t. The ego-aspect of myself was fearful of the fact that if I consciously acknowledged my experience in the afterlife, I’d have to change…drastically. It wasn’t an option, it was a necessity. My “old” life wasn’t what my higher self, my ego-less self, desired and required to exist in. So imagine: a newly graduated Physician Assistant, a brand new mother, a cardiac arrest patient trying to recover, and the wife of a touring musician completely changing their life because of a near death experience…
It didn’t happen. Not for a while, anyway. So, I had to adapt and assimilate and figure out how to live in this world knowing what I knew. I actually remember making the decision to forget about my NDE and focus myself on my life. I had to live rather than simply exist but my soul’s purpose was higher than just existing yet, I couldn’t reconcile the two no matter how hard I tried. And boy, did I try.
Many unhappy years later I found myself miserable and basically alone. I had my beautiful daughter, whom I absolutely lived for. I wasn’t living for myself, or my husband. My NDE was a constant through many ups and downs and changes in my life, always there, nagging at me to pay attention to it. Finally, one day when I’d had enough, I decided to revisit it and wrote my experience down. The whole thing, from start to finish and actually felt it through. I found myself in tears wanting desperately to be able to carry the incredible infinite love of the universe with me, to feel it permeate every bit of my soul, to merge collectively with it once again. I remember being angry at myself for digging it up again, feeling the frustration and pain of not knowing how to use it in my life when something hit me. I became acutely aware of what I needed to do. It was very simple, the message of my NDE. Love. Love is all. All is love. I am love and loved beyond measure.
Love was the answer and it was where my work began. Learning how to live in this world as that love was one of the reasons I came back. The other was to meet the person who would help me on my path back to myself. Overarching it all was being a mother and guide to my daughter. I’m doing all those things and will continue to do all these things until my last breath is taken once again.
It’s truly a journey.
Love to you on yours. Lots and lots of it. xox